Just scared right now
I'm 19, currently in Argentina to do volunteer work. For context; I have social anxiety. I just graduated high school and wanted to try something like this, while doing what I love. But ever since I stepped foot into the airport, i just feel like breaking down every time I look around me.
I'm just so scared. I didn't think I would be, or miss my family, but I do and I really am lost without them. Everywhere I go people stare at me-- it's bad enough when they do it back home and it affects me, but here in a foreign country, I feel like I'm their enemy or something. My Spanish... just doesn't exist. Me and other volunteers were told we didn't have to learn much beyond some words, so I followed that. But when I got here I was the only one unable to hold a small conversation.
And on that, I tried to join a gym in two different areas - one of them, the guy at the counter pretty much said no, no when I simply asked what one session cost (in Spanish), and the other... everyone inside just stopped what they were doing and stared me right back out the door. The gym is one thing I want to do while I'm here, the one thing that might make me OK. But I don't know what to do.
That just about goes for everything. I feel unwanted here... on top of my anxious desires to go home and go back to my comfort zone. Again, I'm just scared. There really is no other word to describe it. I'm just scared, and I don't know how much longer I can take it.
Submitted December 15, 2017 at 07:01PM by Pyrnne http://ift.tt/2BdTqOv
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